Note: This post is Part 5 of the "Not Our News" series. The events and feelings depicted actually occurred a few weeks ago but could not be shared until the news was public. Also, the people involved gave me permission to share.
Five Days After the News
There have been times this week in which I want to just hide in the corner, pull a blanket over my head, and stay there. I didn't want to do this infertility thing anymore. I was done picking myself up and carrying on. I was done fighting. I just wanted to quit.
Then I realized that it wouldn't help. At the end of the day, I'd be in a sad, lonely heap in the corner. Then what? I could stay there, but what would that accomplish? I certainly wouldn't feel better. I only had one other option: get up and carry on. Stop focusing on how hard I have it or how miserable I am. I've had my cryfest; it's time to move on.
How can I move on? Count my blessings. Although Satan tries to distract me from seeing blessings and praising God, the blessings are still there. I still have the best husband on the planet. I am still part of two wonderful, godly families. We still have all of our needs met. We still owe everything to our Savior, whose suffering saved us from eternal suffering. Through Him, we get to leave suffering behind someday. Can I get an "amen"?
Another way I can move on is to stop thinking about myself and start thinking about others. Did I mention that my sister-in-law is pregnant?! My new little niece or nephew is being knit together by the Maker as I write this. Woohoo! In addition, my sister and brother-in-law are in the process of adding a third child to their family through adoption. Children are a blessing from the Lord. Period. Our children or otherwise. I will choose to recognize them as such and strive to be a great aunt.