A Weekend in the Life

Our weekends are not usually memorable. This one was probably no exception, but it was interesting nonetheless. Here are a few "lights," not really high or low, just there:

  • Louie has recently developed the bad habit of jumping onto the furniture. On Saturday, he jumped onto the chair by the window. As I opened my mouth to scold him, he jumped. 
 And in one cat-like movement, Louie the Ninja was on the narrow window sill. 

And in one cat-like movement, Louie the Ninja was on the narrow window sill. 

  • Saturday looked like a sunny spring day, but stepping outside revealed the brisk forty-degree temperature. Oh yeah, it's still winter. Shhh, don't tell my flowers. They think it is actually spring.
 Thank you, previous owners of our home, for planting these flowers. We have no idea what they are, but the new life is exciting!

Thank you, previous owners of our home, for planting these flowers. We have no idea what they are, but the new life is exciting!

  • To top off a surprisingly productive Saturday around the house, I decided to bake something. The result was a reminder why baking inspiration rarely hits me, and why Louie has been confused by my use of the KitchenAid mixer BOTH of the times I have used it. Yes, that is approximately two times in the five months we have had Louie. Before you frown at my lack of baking, please review the result. 
 Ooey gooey may be fine for a cookie, but not for a bread. This is a normally-delicious cottage cheese dill batter bread recipe. It said to bake for about 50 minutes at 350 degrees. I baked it for an hour at 350 and then left it in the warm oven a while longer just in case. The inside was a gooey mess. Blech! The garbage can ate well that night.

Ooey gooey may be fine for a cookie, but not for a bread. This is a normally-delicious cottage cheese dill batter bread recipe. It said to bake for about 50 minutes at 350 degrees. I baked it for an hour at 350 and then left it in the warm oven a while longer just in case. The inside was a gooey mess. Blech! The garbage can ate well that night.

  • I also made the mistake of reading a blog post about a foster/adopt situation that ended badly. According to the blogger, her family was very close to adopting their foster son when an unfortunate accident occurred. They were (unjustly) accused with abuse/neglect and the child was removed from their home. What if something like that happened to us? Kids trip, fall off their bikes, play hard, and get bumps and bruises. What if somebody thinks that we caused them? I suppose biological parents have these concerns, too. The stakes feel high for me. Adoption is our route to a family. An incident like that could mean we would never have a family. Gulp.

So, there you have a little insight into my weekend. Now we are off to watch the Super Bowl with friends. I don't have a team to cheer for, but I will be cheering on former foster child Brian Tyms

Don't Miss Martin Luther King, Jr. Day

Moving toward adoption, we are trying to prepare for the children the Lord will place in our family. They could be infants, toddlers, or older. They could be boys or girls. There is a very good chance that their skin will not match ours. Thinking about having an ethnically diverse family is exciting, but I am also recognizing a need for knowledge. 

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Ready, Set, Here We (Don't) Go

Our adoption process is moving slowly. And we haven't even started yet. Sigh.

We are still hoping to adopt through the foster care system, but have not figured out where to start. Through a county? Which county? Through an agency? Which agency? I keep researching and talking to people here and there, but we have not made any official progress. I was really excited to attend an adoption/foster care group at a local church this Monday night. Monday was the day we were really going to get answers. Then, I looked online for the meeting time, only to discover that the meeting isn't until next week. Sigh again. 

I am still trying to pray that God puts our family together however and with whomever He sees fit. He will do that. I just want to get started. Maybe next week...

Convoluted Thoughts

Tomorrow was my deadline. I was supposed to have done the research and made a plan. Instead, the days filled up and disappeared. I knew everyone back home would want an update as much as I wanted to have one. Well, here's the update:

THERE IS NO UPDATE

We still do not have children (surprising, right?). We are still planning to adopt through the foster care system... 

And that's as far as we have gotten. I have been connecting with others who have walked this process before, so I guess that is a step in the right direction. I hear that there will be a lot of forms to fill out, but haven't seen any of them yet. I hear there are classes starting in January. We think we know which county to begin with. According to the website, the next step is contacting a specific person. And that is where we got stuck. You see, both of us have been working full time. During business hours, we are at work. Lately, work has been crazy busy and exhausting for both of us, so our mental energy is spent by the end of the day. Phone calls and paperwork are forgotten. And so, the weeks and months have passed until here comes Christmas. 

It's fine, really. The gaping hole of childlessness has not been as obvious to us lately. For a season, our childlessness seemed to be in our face all day every day. Infertility was our main "thing." Now, we have good jobs, our own house, and a puppy. In addition, we are getting plugged in at our church, which means activities and new friendships. We had focused in so much on the (good) thing that was missing that we had lost sight of all the other aspects of life. This zooming out feels good.

And yet, it's Christmas again. Christmas is a marker, like passing GO on another year. By the time you get back around the board, you expect to have made progress. We made progress in some ways, but failed in the kid category. Not just failed to have kids, but failed to even have a plan. 

On the Christmas trip we are about to embark on, we plan to see at least eight family members/friends who didn't exist at the beginning of our infertility journey. Some of the pain has lessened, but the sheer number of years and children is still shocking. 

I'm sorry. This post seems depressing. I am really not depressed or even feeling down. This season just makes me think. So, welcome to my convoluted thoughts.

If you want a little more insight into Christmas and infertility, check out this post. She describes the season so well. This year is our fourth "Last Christmas," by the way. 

Have a very Merry Christmas! May we lose sight of ourselves in light of the Gift this season is actually about.